Non-Binary Student Commits Suicide by Cop

Scout Schultz was a 21-year student at Georgia Tech and the leader of the Georgia Tech LGBT Alliance.

scout

Why?

I don’t know anything about Scout’s state of mind, but I have to say that this incident isn’t puzzling to me like some such incidents are, because Scout was non-binary, and non-binary people don’t fit anywhere. Not only don’t we fit into the usual categories in the world; we’re even out of place among LGBTQ groups. Even transgender people, who themselves are often on the margins of the already-marginalized LGBTQ community, are usually one gender or the other.

As a non-binary person, it’s hard not to feel like you’re misplaced, a permanent outsider. It’s also hard to believe sometimes that you will ever find a romantic partner, because you can’t be understood at a glance, and it’s usually impossible to know who might even have the capacity to be romantically interested in you just by looking. Straight and gay people generally have a huge pool of potential soulmates (or one-night stands, depending on what they’re looking for). Trans people and non-binary people, on the other hand, are often left wondering if there’s anyone at all for them.

None of these things forces a person to suicide, but they certainly don’t help.

Sorry, but a thing about words

According to a BBC article, Scout “identified as intersex,” but intersex means having been born with ambiguous sexual anatomy; it’s not a gender identity in the usual sense. Apparently Scout had described themself in a profile as “bisexual, nonbinary and intersex,” but I’m disappointed that the BBC didn’t check their terminology and stick with the adjective that appears to be most accurate, “nonbinary.” Scout may have been intersex, according to the Washington Post,

Both parents remembered well the time that Scout came out to them.

“It wasn’t a shock because we’re welcoming and loving parents,” Bill Schultz [Scout’s father] said. “It shouldn’t have been hard for Scout to come out but I think there were some issues involved there which is why they did a session in therapy.”

I don’t imagine Bill Schultz would have been that surprised if Scout actually were intersex, so I can only conclude that Scout misunderstood what the word meant and that media outlets aren’t checking their terms to make sure they correct the mistake. That’s disappointing, because the words really do matter. Intersex people can be male, female, non-binary, or other, just like anyone else. It doesn’t help for media outlets to be sloppy about their word usage and suggest otherwise.

The Bi-gender Flag

Until I dove into being bi-gender, I’d never realized that different romantic orientations and gender identities had their own flags. It also never occurred to me why you’d want a flag for such a thing until this week, when I’m planning on attending my first Pride event. (Yes, I know, it’s ridiculous never to have been part of one before.) Suddenly, I realize that there’s a bi-gender flag, and I could wave it around, and there would actually be a chance of someone seeing me with it and pretty much fully understanding my gender identity just by looking. Boy, is that a novel thought!

Unfortunately, since of course there’s no central authority of queer people (what would that look like), it turns out there are more than one bi-gender flag. It’s going to be hard enough just to get people to recognize one flag on sight, so more than one design is a problem! Because of that, I’m going to only show the most common/popular/widely-accepted bi-gender flag here.

I love this flag: I picture myself bouncing up and down from the top to the bottom, with some other bi-gender people hovering in the middle, where the lavender is.

Unfortunately, as far as I can tell, nobody actually sells these flags. I am looking around, and I’ll update the post if I find a place that sells them. I don’t have a use for a big banner, but I’d love a flag on a stick I can wave around.

One fairly common mistake seems to be to use the Intersex flag. For anyone not familiar, Intersex means having physical characteristics of both male and female sexes. This is of course completely different from being bi-gender, which is having two genders (often, but not always male and female), taking turns and/or in some mix.